What do I do after graduation?

Manuela writes about the uncertainty and anxiety of employment after uni, and the importance of self-care.

- Manuela

�I took the first job I could and ended up in a far worse state than I would have after a few more months at home working out what would make me happy�.

After Graduation - What Happens?

Once my course had finished, I clung by my fingernails to my tiny London flat until, jobless and bored stiff, I was collected by my parents after graduation. They whisked me back to the middle of rural nowhere, where I set up camp with my laptop and a notepad, and tried to think of what I�d learned over the past three years that might be an employable skill�. And so began the toughest year I�ve had to date.

My boyfriend and most of my friends had another year to go until graduation; to me it was imperative that I find a way back to them in London. But my greatest fear wasn�t loneliness, it was lack of identity. For the past three years I�d put �student� as my occupation, and for the past 19 years of my life my raison d'�tre was to fill my tiny head with knowledge. Now that I�d run out of things to learn, who was I now?

I had no idea whatsoever what I might enjoy, or what I would be good at in the �real world�. Through trial and error, I eventually discovered a job title for which the description seemed to fit my personality, and the benefits and starting salary seemed unbelievably generous. I landed my first interview for the position of �junior recruitment consultant�. Manuela - 1 : Hopelessness - 0. I was convinced I was on the road to success now. But I hadn�t stopped to consider what would make me happy�. 

Losing Myself to Work 

Fast-forward through a whirlwind of sickening interviews and miserable morning commutes, I�m a fledgling recruiter and I hate my life. I was balancing my job with rowing, a boyfriend and friends all still at university, staying �in shape� and job hunting for the mystery career that, I believed, would be my ticket to happiness. These were all leftovers from my former student life; I couldn�t throw them away. Most of my support network still being at university, I had nobody to benchmark against and nobody to recognise, when I couldn�t, exactly when �not OK� turned into �really not OK�. I was crying on the tube to and from work, at rowing I was terrified of messing up and consequently my performance plummeted. The only time my boyfriend and I could see each other was the occasional weekday evening and our relationship had started to nose-dive. I couldn�t remember what I used to be like at university, or what I was supposed to be looking for now. 

I hadn�t found a permanent flat, so I didn�t have a GP, let alone the time to go and see one. So it wasn�t until I finally turned to Google that I discovered there was a name for what I was feeling: anxiety. I�d never suffered from a mental health problem before - I struggled coming to terms with it so I sat on the problem for a while hoping it would go away. It took me another four months before I booked a doctors� appointment, by which time, I�d handed my manager my notice. 

I wouldn�t want anyone else who�s just graduated to make the same mistake as me. I was petrified of reaching September - the month I�ve always started a new term or school or subject - and finding myself trapped at home, doing absolutely nothing and feeling like I was worth even less. I took the first job I could and ended up in a far worse state than I would have after a few more months at home working out what would make me happy. 

Finding What Matters 

Now I�m in the exact same position as this time last year, but this time around, I�m backing myself. If spending my days in an office, or working in London will make me feel the way I felt, then I�m going to have enough self-respect and confidence to turn my back on that lifestyle. I�m going by trial and error again, but this time I�m trying my hand at freelance writing, trying to make enough to fund a lifestyle where I can spend the majority of my time outdoors. This time a year ago I didn�t believe I�d be good enough for a dream job if I did find it, let alone be confident enough to slow down and work out what I really valued. Now I respect myself enough to do what makes me feel good about myself. 

A job is a job, it will give you money, yes, and something to put on your LinkedIn. But if it�s going to be the thing you rely on to give you value and purpose, I�d urge you to stop for a moment. 

You don�t need a title to tell you you�re enough. Do what makes you happy.

I'm Manuela and I'm a King's College London graduate. I had excellent mental health until after university, when I immediately started suffering from anxiety. I'm sharing my experiences of struggling during the period immediately after university when most people lose the support they had while studying. I'm hopeful that by sharing my story and advice I'll be able to help people going through a similar experience realize that they're not alone.

You can find more support on anxiety here. Image taken from here.

A Note On Graduate Mental Health

In this blog, Emily talks about her mental health as a recent graduate and gives advice to those in a similar situation. 

-Emily

When I took my final exam back at the end of May, the one thought that went through my brain was not �I finished my degree, time to celebrate and relax for a while!� It was �I finished my degree, what do I do now? What happens next?� All of a sudden, the life that had been lectures, assignments, exams, and stress was over � forever. I didn�t even have the distraction of the university paper to focus on as the final issue of the academic year had already been printed. 

As a Graduate, which has taken a lot of getting used to, I do think that in some respects, I am lucky in the fact that I have had jobs throughout the summer and have a pretty exciting opportunity lined up. About a week or so after finishing my degree, I was browsing the Internet for jobs in Europe � imagining myself teaching English in a sunny country like Spain or Italy. I came across an advert for a job with Education First (EF) teaching English in China and I just thought �why not? If I don�t do something this extreme now, I never will!� That�s how I�ve ended up preparing to go and work and live in China for a minimum of fifteen months. 

My Graduation ceremony back in July was quite a surreal blur of an experience. I was more interested in getting my certificate to begin the process of applying for a VISA to go to China, than I was about the ceremony itself. Also, I was halfway through a month-long contract teaching English in a summer school, which was a very intense and exhausting job to do. It didn�t hit me until a week or so later that it actually happened, and this is my life now.

University is definitely like this protective bubble in a sense. We have responsibilities and our own lives, but we also have a lot of support and guidance when it comes to education, work experience, careers advice, mental health support, etc... Once we�re in the �real world� that all sort of ceases and suddenly, we�re on our own and the world feels huge and scary. Since Graduation, and since leaving Swansea, I�ve experienced a dip in my mental health. Personally, for example, I�ve been feeling as though I need to be in consistent, constant employment rather than temporary contracts here and there until I eventually move to China. Graduate mental health, I believe, is a complex thing, and it is very easy to fall into the cycle of not feeling good enough when getting rejected from job after job, and also missing the friends we�ve made at university, comparing ourselves to others and feeling as though we �should� be in a certain place at a particular time in our lives. 

If anyone who�s recently graduated from university and finds themselves feeling similar, here�s some important tips to remember:

� Remember that you�re living your life � you�ll end up where you�re meant to be when you�re meant to get there, with who you�re meant to be there with! (That�s a mouthful).

� Remember to practice self-care, which includes being kind to yourself physically and mentally. Whether it�s congratulating yourself for something you�ve done, or just doing something you enjoy doing, be kind to yourself! 

� Remind yourself that you graduated from university. It is a massive achievement. That degree certificate, that grade � whether it�s a 1st, a 2:1 or a 2:2, it doesn�t matter � it represents years of hard work, dedication, commitment, passion and focus. 

To quote one of my best friends � �No one truly has their life together; we are all on our own little journey and go at our own pace.� Keep going! 

My name is Emily (Em). I have recently graduated from Swansea University with my BA degree in Modern Languages, Translation & Interpreting; I was also passionate about and dedicated to Swansea Student Media and the University students� newspaper � Waterfront. I blog for Student Minds because I have experienced mental health issues as a student and now as a graduate, as well as other health issues, and I support friends who also have mental health difficulties. I am a passionate writer and writing has been important in my mental health experiences � both in helping me to explore and to cope with my mental health, as well as sharing my story in order to help others.

World Mental Health Day 2018 � Student and Graduate Mental Health

In this blog Emily raises awareness about the importance of discussing student and graduate mental health this World Mental Health Day.

-Emily

Each year, World Mental Health Day is marked on the 10th October. World Mental Health Day was first celebrated in 1992 and is a day for global mental health education, awareness and advocacy against social stigma. Last year, the theme of 2017�s World Mental Health Day was mental health in the workplace. This year, the theme for 2018�s World Mental Health Day is young people and mental health in a changing world. According to the World Health Organisation�s website, �adolescence and the early years of adulthood are a time of life when many changes occur, for example changing schools, leaving home, and starting university or a new job. For many, these are exciting times. They can also be times of stress and apprehension however. In some cases, if not recognised and managed, these feelings can lead to mental illness. The expanding use of online technologies, while undoubtedly bringing many benefits, can also bring additional pressures, as connectivity to virtual networks at any time of the day and night grows.� In this blog post, I am going to explore the challenges that not only university students may face with regards to mental health, but also the challenges that new university graduates can face. 

The recent Student Minds campaign #DearFresherMe saw many students (past and present) share their experiences and advice about mental health and starting university in order to advise and reassure new Freshers about to embark on their university journeys. Starting university in itself as a new first year can be daunting and challenging � moving away from home, living with new people and making new friends as well as starting a university course can cause a lot of stress and anxiety for some students. However, mental health problems for students don�t necessarily always begin during the first year of study � they can happen at any stage during university. In fact, each new academic year brings with it a fresh wave of challenges, including increased workload, living in student housing, perhaps studying abroad for a semester or a year, and the worry about what to do after university finishes. 

What can students do to help their mental health? Firstly, it is important to highlight that asking for help and indeed finding help and support for mental health is difficult. It can be embarrassing and worrying to find the confidence to admit that you�re struggling. Usually, however, there are lots of people who can support you. For example, I struggled a lot with mental health problems during my time at Swansea University, and I found it especially helpful to speak to the wonderful staff in the Swansea University Students� Union�s Advice and Support Centre. They were always non-judgemental and usually just always available if I needed a chat. But, it can also be helpful to speak to other people, like a tutor, additional support services or a GP, as well as friends and family. Keeping busy and finding something you thoroughly enjoy doing and taking part in can also significantly help with mental health. 

Moving on, graduate mental health is something that is not heard of, not well known, and definitely not talked about enough. I think it is misunderstood just how challenging it is to have gotten used to being at university which is a bit like a bubble, to suddenly being out in the big wide world! Little has been said about the post-graduation feeling of anxiety and confusion, and �this silent problem is taking over the lives of recent graduates, and while conversations around mental health in general have been getting louder, this is an area that is still relatively quiet� (Source). Leaving university is a shock to the system and it can be extremely tough to adjust to post-graduate life. However, it�s important to remember that your degree certificate signifies years of hard work, dedication and passion to your course, and that it is perfectly okay to not be in a perfect job right way or even to have a clue what you want to do. 

With this year�s World Mental Health Day focusing on young people, it is a good idea to challenge people�s perceptions of student and graduate mental health, as well as to educate about these important matters. This can help to further reduce the stigma that surrounds mental health at university and post-university and hopefully give more students and graduates the confidence and the reassurance to ask for support when required. 

�Emotional pain is not something that should be hidden away and never spoken about. There is truth in your pain, there is growth in your pain, but only if it�s first brought out into the open.� 

- Steven Aitchison

My name is Emily (Em). I have recently graduated from Swansea University with my BA degree in Modern Languages, Translation & Interpreting; I was also passionate about and dedicated to Swansea Student Media and the University students� newspaper � Waterfront. I blog for Student Minds because I have experienced mental health issues as a student and now as a graduate, as well as other health issues, and I support friends who also have mental health difficulties. I am a passionate writer and writing has been important in my mental health experiences � both in helping me to explore and to cope with my mental health, as well as sharing my story in order to help others.

Returning to uni after eating disorder treatment

Laura reflects on the highs and lows of returning to university after taking a year out to receive treatment for anorexia.

-Laura

After a whole year at home doing little more than attend therapy appointments, make meal plans, volunteer at my old primary school and do hundreds of crosswords, I was heading back to uni. I�m not going to say that the past year was transformative, or even that it miraculously made me recover, because I am still fighting anorexia day after day. It was a tough year and it tested me, but I realised that sitting around waiting for recovery to come along was pointless, because truthfully it wasn�t going to happen like that. I�m not going to one day decide to get better, especially if I have nothing tangible to get better for. Which is why I decided to go back: for purpose, for direction, for a future.

Nothing was plain sailing, but there were some overwhelmingly positive things to come out of returning to university. And the best? Normality! Finally, for the first time in a long time, my day was not completely structured around when/what I would eat and my mind was not completely consumed by my eating disorder. I was *almost* a normal, 21-year-old student, and it felt great. It was great to be stressed about an upcoming assessment rather than thinking about calories. It was great to talk about something besides anorexia, it was great to laugh and share and have fun. I loved being back in a city. I loved learning again, and I felt excited about learning from people at the forefront of their field. Anorexia had taken so much away from me, and I was finally starting to reclaim my life.

But inevitably, there was the bad stuff. With nobody to be accountable to, nobody to tell me what to eat and when, the ball fell in my court: I was alone, and I struggled, but I had an incredible support system and they were there for me unconditionally. I had bad days with anxiety, I found socialising difficult, but I did it regardless. I pushed through the worry and the fear and the panic and the misery and the negative feelings and I made it through the whole term. I am not ashamed to say, I am proud of myself.

I fully believe that university isn�t easy for anyone. I think it can be a place of loneliness and ostracism and I think it can breed mental illness. The pressure is intense from all angles: you have to be sociable, but also studious, you have to be sporty or talented but academic and conscientious, you have to volunteer and get work experience but also complete every essay by the deadline and get a decent grade. You have to have your career plan sorted, your CV overflowing and your contact list ever-increasing. You are expected to do everything and be everything, but it�s not possible.

Pressure like this is what pushes people to the edge; it�s what pushes people over the edge. It�s important that people aren�t ashamed to ask for help, and it�s important that they know what help is out there should they need it. Because what�s the point of pushing yourself to breaking point for a degree if it has such a detrimental impact upon your health? We need to preach balance, breaks, and better mental health care to stop university becoming such a difficult place to thrive for some.

If you are worried about yourself or a friend please visit here for further support.

Hi, I'm Laura! I�m a final year student at university and after struggling with anorexia for almost two years, I wanted to share some of my experiences with the hope of encouraging students to speak out and helping others feel less alone. 

It's okay to reach out

Hannah shares her experience of anxiety around her dissertation and how reaching out for support helped.

 - Hannah Morton

At school, I�ve always had to work hard and had been a fairly average student. I�ve also been a pretty good procrastinator and when you team this with my anxiety, you can easily become a master of avoidance. I�ve struggled with depression and anxiety since my mid-teens however when it came time to go to university I believed I�d beaten it. For the first two years of my studies, things were generally fine but then came my third year and my dissertation.

I had decided my title and study for my dissertation, spent the summer abroad carrying out research and found the papers and books to refer to. However, when it came to writing, I�d freeze. I can�t tell you how many hours spent staring at that blank document desperately willing myself to write something.My dissertation had become such a big deal to me that I was completely overwhelmed.

I continued all my other work.  Coursework, readings, exam revision, that was all fine but when asked how my dissertation was going, my response was simply, �it�s going�. Truthfully, it was going nowhere. I disengaged with my supervisor and buried my head in sand.

In March of my final semester, it became too much. My anxiety had become so all-consuming; I fell into depression. I just felt complete despair and had an overwhelming feeling I just couldn�t do it. I didn�t want to leave my bed; sleep was an easy escape from reality. I was certain I was going to have to drop out of University, right at the last hurdle. I felt so weak and disappointed in myself.

Continuing my studies felt impossible but one day I managed to find some strength and did something I should have done a lot earlier, I reached out for help. I made an appointment with my GP and told him everything they gave me a prescription and referred me to a counselling service. I then pushed myself to ring my mum and tell her what had happened. This was something I was extremely apprehensive to do but when I did the biggest emotion I felt was relief. I was able to get support and though it wasn�t easy, I managed to complete and submit my dissertation, finish my third year and graduate!

When you�re struggling it can feel exceptionally lonely and it can be so hard to reach out to anyone. I was ashamed of myself and felt everyone would judge me and think badly of me. In reality, everyone was so supportive and I only wished I�d been able to do it sooner.

It is important to reach out in a way that is right for you but honestly, it is absolutely worth taking that chance. This experience also taught me that if you�re determined, you really can do everything you need to do.





Hi, I'm Hannah. I graduated in 2012 and have depression and anxiety, I have done since I was around 14/15yrs old. I wanted to write for Student Minds as my mental health has had a big impact on my life, both negative and positive, including my studies. I'm now a mental health blogger and campaigner, working in Student Support, hoping to help others with similar experiences.