My experiences as an LGBT+ student

In this blog, Emily talks about navigating university as a LGBT+ student and the importance of finding a support network.

�I�ve been embraced by a new community. That�s what happens when you�re finally honest about who you are; you find others like you.� � Chaz Bono.

When I first arrived at university five years ago, I�d never really considered what it meant to be LGBT+. Personally, I�ve never been one who prioritised sex or relationships. That hasn�t really changed during my time at university. However, university has been a chance for me to explore my sexuality and begin to discover who I am.

I�ve had strong feelings for males and for females. I would comfortably express myself as bisexual. However, simultaneously, I have never had any desire for anything sexual with either men or women. Therefore, I would also label myself as asexual.

Labelling myself as either bisexual or asexual has been something that I�ve only felt comfortable in doing throughout my most recent, final year at university. Before then, I�ve kept it a secret from everyone. Several things have made me more comfortable in being open about my bisexuality/asexuality confusion, including surrounding myself with people who are part of the LGBT+ community. Most of my closest friends are LGBT+, lots of the people I look up to as role models are LGBT+ and I love and cherish them all � they�re all also the kindest, most inspirational people I know. I think being around LGBT+ people has made me to feel more comfortable about my own sexuality and my own place in the LGBT+ community, and is also useful for other students who are learning about their sexual identity.

One of the regrets I take away from my time at university is not joining the LGBT+ society or attending of their events � I recommend this for any LGBT+ or questioning student. For the first four years of my degree, I didn�t feel comfortable being open about it. Then, in my final year, while I wanted to be involved, I was too busy. However, something I valued a lot was having the opportunity to explore my sexuality through the students� newspaper. I wrote articles about being confused between bisexual and asexual, and I also wrote creative writing pieces with a focus on LGBT+ relationships.

Being an LGBT+ student at university isn�t always simple and easy, but one thing that I think really does make a lot of difference, genuinely, is having a brilliant support network around you.

�What is straight? A line can be straight, or a street, but the human heart, oh, no, it�s curved like a road through mountains.� � Tennessee Williams. 

My name is Emily (Em). I have recently graduated from Swansea University with my BA in Modern Languages, Translation & Interpreting;  I was also involved with Swansea Student Media and the university's student newspaper - Waterfront. I blog for Student Minds because I have experienced mental health issues and support friends who also have mental health difficulties. i am passionate writer and writing has been important in my mental health experience, both in helping me to explore and cope with my mental health as well as sharing my story in order to help others. 

Trans Mental Health at University

Shev shares their experience of being transgender at university.

- Shevek Imogen Fodor (them/them)

I�ve started to joke that I came to uni as a lesbian woman and I�m leaving uni as a non-binary quoisexual (aka WTFsexual � I don�t know what�s going on). Exploring and discovering my gender identity whilst at university has been a liberating and affirming experience, but it has also had its challenges, and has noticeably had an impact on my (already not great) mental health. 

Imagine all of the stresses that extenuate mental health problems at university: trying to fit in with new flatmates, getting used to new living conditions and routines and a harder course with new expectations. Awareness of mental health difficulties and the challenges students face has been increasing, but trans people have all of this to deal with on top of having to navigate an oppressive, cisgendered world.

There is the daunting prospect of negotiating the bureaucracy of administration systems. This can be especially problematic if you are transitioning in the middle of your degree, as aspects of transitioning can be time consuming and anxiety-inducing. Non-binary identities aren�t recognised in the UK, so it can be a lottery as to whether your gender and prefixes will be available on forms. Furthermore, any change to birth certificates and passports, or changing your name by deed poll, is essentially a massive headache, and something I don�t want to think about when I�m worrying about getting my 3000-word essay written and submitted on time.

One of the consequences of this is the prospect of being misgendered and deadnamed by staff and students, who can be ignorant about trans issues. This term I emailed all of my tutors to ask them to use my new name, which is different from the one on the university systems. When introducing myself in the first seminars of term I told my peers that I use �they/them� pronouns. Luckily everyone has been very supportive, but there is always the awareness that people are likely to forget. Being misgendered is a horrible experience, as it intensifies gender dysphoria; try battling with difficult academic theories whilst also having an underlying, overwhelming feeling of being uncomfortable in your own skin. I have been misgendered by councillors, tutors and peers, either because they assume my gender or have forgotten how I identify. Informing and correcting people is especially hard if you also have social anxiety and/or don�t want to make things awkward.

Then there is traversing social life. The realms of sports are very binarised, and intimidating for both binary and non-binary trans people. A personal bugbear of mine is trying to create a space for trans people within performance societies � where roles are often gendered and there is inadvertent transphobic humour � and trying to encourage people to use less gendered language (like alternatives for �ladies and gentlemen�). When going out, the consequences of how you present yourself in clubs and town can be terrifying, as you have to worry about being met with transphobia based on how you look whilst also wanting to fit in.

This is just a small taster of what life at university is like as a trans person. It is unsurprising why this extra stress can extenuate mental health problems that are already present.

To end on a positive note, one really great thing at my university has been the support of the trans network, which has a secret Facebook group that helps provide a safe space for our trans community. Here everyone - whether they are questioning, transitioning, closeted or out - can post experiences both positive and negative, questions, and advice. It helps combat feelings of isolation which trans people often experience, and can contribute to anxiety and depression. Being able to talk in confidence has helped me work out my gender identity, and on many occasions it has been such a relief to be able to vent when I've been misgendered or frustrated by ignorance. It also allows more experienced members of the university to help by providing valuable tips on navigating university support and administrative systems, and discuss ways to campaign and work towards making the university more accepting.

Shev is studying English and Related Lit and is blogging because they have always been open about their mental health problems and want to help break down stigma by helping people feel more comfortable so that they can talk about it and reach support more effectively.

Educating Myself on Myself: Embracing my Bisexuality at University

Eilidh shares her experience of being bisexual at university and her experience of coming out. 

- Eilidh Tyler Reid

I always found it difficult to admit to myself, never mind anyone else, that I was bisexual. Throughout my childhood I�d only ever (knowingly) met one person who wasn�t heterosexual, a friend of my mum�s; a tall, foreboding and wonderfully flamboyant gay man. Not exactly the broadest of experiences as a kid. As a teenager, I attended a Catholic all-girls school, typically rife with gossip, of which anyone who was openly LGBTQ+ was frequently the subject.

And so, I spent years ignoring my sexuality by only dating guys. I thought I could continue doing that forever, but holding back made me feel increasingly isolated, miserable and exhausted. I was method acting for so long that the emotional exertion became a drain on my mental wellbeing, and I began to shut myself off and become more and more uncomfortable in my own skin.

My first turning point came a year or so before I went to university when I finally came out to two of my friends who�d openly identified as lesbian and bisexual respectively. This was my first experience of feeling like I could connect and finally talk about sexuality in a safe space. As soon as the words left my mouth I felt a heady sense of relief, as if I�d been holding my breath for a long time. It would be another while until I experienced that same weightlessness, at the end of year one of my degree.

Being at university is something entirely different from what came before, and a place where many of us feel like we can begin being more open about who we are. I was lucky enough to be a part of a university with a very active LGBTQ+ community. Through the LGBTQ+ society I could go to events that celebrated identities out with heteronormativity, a far cry from my high school experience! It was eye-opening, in the best way possible.

I didn�t fully come out until my penultimate year of study. A large part of that decision surprisingly came from the academic side when I came across an author called Katherine Mansfield. I loved her work so much that she ended up being the focal point of my dissertation. The other thing that I fervently admired about her was her unapologetic bisexuality.

I read about her earlier struggles with her identity, and later accounts of her proud adoration of her female partners. I recognised the gradual acceptance of one�s sexuality from my own ongoing development. The fact that my new heroine shared a similar internal battle inspired me to research further into writers who also identified as bisexual, and I was amazed and elated to find out that many of my favourite authors were the same as me. This literary sense of community coupled with the welcoming, safe environment offered by the LGBTQ+ students at university helped me to finally embrace who I was. I can now talk openly about my sexuality and stand up tall as I do so.

The most important part, I think, was that feeling of being a part of something bigger, no longer alien in one�s sexuality. Growing up without the knowledge and awareness of the LGBTQ+ community held me back for years, and I am here to say this: you are notalone. We are here. We are writers. We are artists. We are politicians. We are doctors. We are scientists. We are everything you can think of.

University is a wonderful resource not only for academic learning, but also a means of understanding and loving your identity. Make the most of your university�s LGBTQ+ society, talk and connect with other bisexual students, perhaps even do as I did and find out about how your academic passion correlates with your identity. Always remember that you are part of a community that cares about you and your mental wellbeing. Make the most of your time as a student to embrace your sexuality, I promise you that you won�t regret it. I certainly don�t.

If you'd like further support or information, you can find details for a range of services and organisations listed on our LGBTQ+ Resource Page.

Hello! I'm Eilidh, and I'm from Glasgow. I graduated last year from the University of St Andrews where I studied English Literature. I currently work for Waterstones. I am a passionate advocate for student wellbeing and the importance of mental health support in educational establishments.

LGBT+ Mental Health and Coming Out

�I will not have my life narrowed down. I will not bow down to somebody else's whim or to someone else's ignorance.�

-Bell Hooks

Questions about who we are and what we choose to hide from people is something intrinsically human and in many ways also connected to our physical and psychological wellbeing. Mental health and identity constructions have strong links, which those of us in the LGBTQ community who have experienced different health issues can confirm.

What is it that allows us to define ourselves through our sexuality? Is this a good thing that is absolutely necessary for the formation of our characters or completely insignificant for the lives we then decide to lead? While everyone should have the opportunity to decide these things for themselves, in a society that continues to breed and nurture LGBT+-related discriminatory practices, it is not always possible for us to do.

My research is about these particular experiences for young people, and why it is so important to stop these prejudices, promote openness and acceptance, and reach out to each other.

We know enough to be able to say that LGBT+ individuals, particularly young LGBT+ people, are at a higher risk of developing common mental health problems such as depression and anxiety and are almost three times as likely to have suicidal thoughts (Burton et al., 2013; Lea et al., 2014; Marshal et al 2011). Stress is a key factor for mental health and is caused and maintained by a range of factors, including prejudice and discrimination. In addition to this challenge and the alienation from the rest of society, LGBT+ youth also have to deal with general pressures such as leaving home, finding work or studying and integrating into new communities.

In attempt to avoid judgement and stigma, hiding can seem like an enticing option. But it often doesn�t have the desired protective effect. There is proof that our attempts to conceal our sexual identity can affect us mentally and physically (Quinn & Earnshaw, 2013). The act of revealing one's true identity can be a profound form of liberation from self-imposed stigma and allow people to become part of the LGBT+ community and receive social support - in effect, feel less isolated.

Writer and transgender rights activist Janet Mock has said, �Our stories are ours. They belong to us and we should be able to tell them - not at the convenience of others but when we are ready�. So how important is the role of concealment among LGBT+ youth? And how will this affect their mental health and wellbeing? I strongly believe in the importance of delving into some of these questions and proving that elements like storytelling, social support and freedom of expression can play a crucial role in shedding light on our sexual and gender identities and accepting ourselves for who we are or want to be.

There is always the risk of receiving a hurtful comment from someone closed-minded or ignorant. Remember you haven�t done anything wrong - the problem lies with them. Once we can embrace our �otherness� and our differences, we can leave behind that sense of always looking at ourselves through the eyes of others.

It is important to remember that while LGBT+ people are at a higher risk of developing mental health difficulties, the majority of LGBT+ people are thriving. So why is it that some people are more affected than others? This is something that we don�t have all the answers to. That's why my research focuses on looking at the different ways people cope with challenges like stigma, discrimination and mental health difficulties. I hope that research projects like my own become more common and can slowly begin to change our view of LGBT+ people and mental health, making sure that those who do suffer from mental health difficulties don�t become isolated and can be empowered to reach out.

...


Georgina is a PhD Student, conducting research to understand and intervene with mental health problems in LGBT+ students. This research is being conducted by the LGBT Mental Health Research Group at the Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology and Neuroscience at King's College London. You can find out more about the research here .
Participants are being recruited to take part in a study on stigma and mental health in the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT+) community. They are looking for UK University and College students who identify as a sexual or gender minority to take part in their research. You can be a part of their study by filling in this survey.


If you'd like further support or information, you can find details for a range of services and organisations listed on our LGBTQ+ Resource Page.
The LGBT Foundation have some great tips for coming out, follow the link to find out more here.
�Ultimately there is no right or wrong way to come out. The important thing is to do it the way you want to and the way you feel comfortable.� - The LGBT Foundation



Burton, C. M., Marshal, M. P., & Friedman, M. S. (2013). Sexual Minority-Related Victimization as a Mediator of Mental Health Disparities in Sexual Minority Youth?: A Longitudinal Analysis, 394�402. http://doi.org/10.1007/s10964-012-9901-5

Lea, T., Wit, J. De, & Reynolds, R. (2014). Minority Stress in Lesbian , Gay , and Bisexual Young Adults in Australia?: Associations with Psychological Distress , Suicidality , and Substance Use. http://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-014-0266-6

Marshal, M. P., Dietz, L. J., Friedman, M. S., Stall, R., Smith, H. A., McGinley, J., � Brent, D. A. (2011). Suicidality and depression disparities between sexual minority and heterosexual youth: A meta-analytic review. Journal of Adolescent Health, 49(2), 115�123. http://doi.org/10.1016/j.jadohealth.2011.02.005

Quinn, D. M. & Earnshaw, V. A.(2013) . Concealable Stigmatized Identities and
Psychological WellBeing. Soc Personal Psychol Compass. 7(1): 40�51. doi:10.1111/spc3.12005